i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
