I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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