this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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