yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Randomize
