I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
