i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize