I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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