okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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