I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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