Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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