hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
