dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
