Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
