yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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