Christians are straight up FREAKS
farters have to be the big spoon...
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
my poor anus
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
