..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
We were destined to go to rehab together
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
