I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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