I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
