You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
