somebody snuck up and got me drunk
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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