that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize