went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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