BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
