I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
