He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
After last night, I could never be a politician.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize