Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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