he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize