he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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