The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
organizing the empties. That sober.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Randomize
