PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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