I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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