whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize