He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Randomize
