omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
