my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize