wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
