quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
you inspire me to be a worse person
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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