No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
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