I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
