so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
