i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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