So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
you didnt know i had herpes?
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
