All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
