You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize