those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
