apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
wow bdsm is so cute
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
