Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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