is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize