So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
