I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize