I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
There was a lot of him and a little penis
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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