dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Randomize
