I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
