I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
